My self esteem took an absolute beating after my husbands affair. I felt disgusting and repulsive on so many layers of pain. It was very difficult to pull myself out of that funk, I’m still working on it a lot. I am engaging in a lot of self help work, a lot of time on myself and exploration of who I am because I just lost who I was. Here’s some things that helped me a lot.
The Goddess Revolution by Mel Wells, this is not about affairs at all but is very much about honouring yourself through diet, and self love. It is hard to read when you feel so negative about yourself but you have to suspend that and put your trust in it.
This article is great, it points out some home truths which you’ll need to get on board with most of all that it was never ever your fault. No matter what they told you, no matter what issues there were, no matter what it is that was wrong in your relationship, it is never your fault.
Samuel from Affair Recovery talks about how his wife woo’d him back, initially I found the whole thing a bit repugnant but then I realised that it was more about the fact that by rebuilding her self esteem their marriage became stronger, healthier and Samantha started to rebuild her self esteem. It was beneficial.
Parent Yourself Again: Love Yourself the Way You Have Always Wanted to Be Loved (Self-Compassion Book 3) dives deep into how we see the world and how toxic parenting, or just parenting really, affects the way we live, act, and understand ourselves as we grow in to adulthood. It’s been a big eye opener.
Wake Up and Change Your Life: How to Survive a Crisis and be Stronger, Wiser and Happier. This book has been super helpful for moving on, activities and helping you set goals.